Can it be JUST a number?

So many numbers out there, some mean more to certain people and mean absolutely nothing to others. I am talking about those numbers on the scale. Currently I am fighting with my number and the scale. I started this battle over a year ago and actually, I’ve won. By last summer I was at not only my lightest, but a healthy weight. Then the battle turned to maintaining.

When 2011 started (not that long ago), I wanted to get back into exercising regularly to tone up and stay healthy since I had stopped exercising regularly after the summer. One would think that when you drop about 40 pounds and 4 pant sizes, you would have nothing to complain about and you should be happy. At first, I didn’t. I was so surprised that I surpassed my goal and I loved the way I felt! Now I have started exercising again I am battling with the psychological part that I am healthy and I will not drop in pounds, I will tone, firm up, feel good, but the results won’t be drastic and in the number on the scale. The reason I am having an issue is what am I working for? If I’m not losing the weight (numbers changing on the scale) then, whats the point? In my head, I KNOW that I am healthy and I need to exercise to stay in shape and be strong but I can’t really see the results so, what’s the payoff? I have never been through this and I don’t really know anyone who has, so I have no one to talk to that completely understands. I feel ridiculous because I understand logically but my “girl” mind has that unrealistic images of perfect flashing through my head and let me tell you…, just dropping the weight and fitting in a certain sizes my body does NOT look like those images naked!

Ok, so the whole point was to let out frustration and to see if anyone out there has been through something like this? How did you cope? Can it just be a number or will it always taunt me?


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s